1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/ friends
Stupid Question:-Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer:-Well, it's so hot , there were no cool cabs so I thought i'd watch some advertisements in the cool comfort of the theatre.

2. In the bus: A fat girl wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet
Stupid Question:-Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:-No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia.. ...why don't you try again or should i try this time."

3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask
Stupid Question:-Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:-Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question:-Is the "blah blah blah" dish good
Answer:-No, it’s terrible and made of contaminated cement. We occasionally also spit in it.

5. At a family get-together. When some distant aunt
meets you after years
Stupid Question:-Munna, Chickoo, you've become so big.
Answer:-Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself.



6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask
Stupid Question:-Is the guy you're marrying good?
Answer:-No, he' s a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout...it's just the money.

7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call
Stupid Question:-Sorry. were you sleeping.
Answer:-No. I was playing cricket for India at Sharjah and just when you called Salim Malik was betting with me that Pakistan would win. What do you think?

8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair
Stupid Question:-Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer:-No, it’s autumn and I'm shedding.... ..

9. At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth
Stupid Question:-Tell me if it hurts?
Answer:-And while I'm telling you , you tell me if I bite.

10. You are smoking a cigarette and someone asks
Stupid Question:-Oh, so you smoke
Answer:-No, it's a miracle ........... it was a chalk and now it's in flames!!!

Any of you who had difficulty understanding Thread Deadlocks.
This is for you….

Boss says to Secretary: For a week we will go abroad, so make arrangement.

Secretary makes call to Husband: For a week my boss and I will be going abroad, you look after yourself.

Husband makes call to secret lover: My wife is going abroad for a week, so let’s spend the week together.

Secret lover makes call to small boy whom she is giving private tuition: I have work for a week, so you need not come for class.

Small boy makes call to his grandfather: Grandpa, for a week I don't have class 'coz my teacher is busy. Let's spend the week together.

Grandpa (the 1st boss) makes call to his secretary: This week I am spending my time with my grandson. We cannot attend that meeting.

Secretary makes call to her husband: This week my boss has some work, we cancelled our trip.

Husband makes call to secret lover: We cannot spend this week together; my wife has cancelled her trip.

Secret lover makes call to small boy whom she is giving private tuition: This week we will have class as usual.

Small boy makes call to his grandfather: Grandpa, my teacher said this week I have to attend class. Sorry I can't give you company.

Grandpa makes call to his secretary: Don't worry this week we will attend that meeting, so make arrangement.

!!!!!!!!!!!! !
This IS called deadlock. Can't open .

 :)

Aishwaria - Amitabh - Abhishak

Papa control karo, 

 aapki bahuu hai .

(Papa please control.................. she's your daughter in law)

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Women: A wife was not at home for a whole night. So the next morning, she tells her husband that she stayed at her girlfriend's apartment over night. The husband calls 10 of her best girlfriend's and one of them confirmed that they celebrated birthday party.
 
Men: A husband was not at home for a whole night. So he tells his wife the next morning  that he stayed at his friend's apartment over night. The wife calls 10 of his best friends: 5 of them confirmed that he stayed at their apartment that night and the other 5 claimed that he was still there with them!
 
Conclusion of the story: Men are better friends!!!! J

 What is 710...........???

Well This doesn't mean all khatoons J are stupid when it comes to cars....But there always are (a lot of) exceptions!!

Yesterday I was having some work done at the Honda dealer. A woman came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten.

We all looked at each other, and the mechanic asked,'What is a seven-hundred-ten?'

She replied, 'You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine.I lost it and need a new one. It had always been there.'

The mechanic gave the woman a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like. She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710 !!

He then took her over to another car which had the hood up and asked, 'Is there a 710 on this car?'

She pointed and said, 'Of course, it's right there.'

Now go to the photo below to learn what a 710 is.........